Sandy Hook shooting survivors expected to graduate from Connecticut high school with mixed feelings

Metro

By David Proper

Survivors of the Sandy Hook shooting are set to graduate from Newtown High School with mixed feelings knowing 20 of their murdered classmates won't walk across the stage with them.

About 60 of Connecticut's 330 high school graduates were at Sandy Hook Elementary School when a deranged gunman opened fire Dec. 14, 2012, killing 20 freshmen and six other staff members.

Although the victims of one of the worst school shootings in U.S. history will be honored at the ceremony, how they will be honored has not been revealed.

“I'm definitely going to feel a lot of mixed emotions,” said Emma Ehrens, 17, who was one of 11 children in Class 10 to survive the attack.

“I’m super excited to be finished high school and moving on to the next chapter of my life. But I'm also so…sad, I guess, that I have to go through this scene alone. … I like to think that they will be there with us and walk through this stage with us.

Ehrens was one of five students who spoke to The Associated Press about the upcoming big day and the emotional toll associated with it.

Lilly Wasilnak, 17, said she thought everyone was “super excited” about graduating.

“But I think we can't forget … that a whole section of our class is missing,” said Wasilnak, who was in a classroom down the hall after the shooting.

“And so, as we approach graduation, we all have very mixed emotions – trying to be excited for ourselves and for this accomplishment that we've worked so hard for, but also for those who don't are not able to share it with us, who should have been able to.”

Another student, Grace Fischer, agreed that students graduating from Sandy Hook did not have a typical school experience.

“As much as we tried to have this normal experience, like childhood and high school, it wasn't quite normal,” Fischer, 18, said.

“But even though we're missing…a lot of our class, like Lilly said, we're still graduating.” … We want to be those ordinary teenagers who walk across the stage that day and feel that sense of celebration within ourselves, knowing that we've made it this far.

Students hope that moving on to the next chapters of their lives will give them the opportunity to make a fresh start.

“At Sandy Hook, what happened still threatens us,” said Matt Holden, 17, who was in a classroom down the hall after the shooting.

“I think going away and being able to create new memories and meet new people, even though we will be more isolated from people who have stories like ours, we will be freer to write our own story. …And kind of, you know, don't let this event that happened because we were very young define our lives.

“For me, I feel like it's definitely going to get better and I'll be able to break free from this system and be able to just become my own person rather than, again, the kid from Sandy Hook,” Ehrens added .

Students have been involved in the Junior Newtown Action Alliance and anti-gun violence efforts in an effort to prevent further tragic mass shootings.

Ella Seaver, 18, said she plans to study psychology in college to become a therapist and give back to others.

“Having my voice heard and working with all of these amazing people to try to create change really gives meaning to the trauma that we've all been forced to experience,” Seaver said.

“It’s a way to feel like you’re doing something.” Because we are. We are fighting for change and we won't stop until we achieve it. »

With post wires